The Love Affair

Cigarettes and I have had a thing going on for close to ten years now. We've had so many ups and downs, stops and starts and no matter how hard I try to end it, it keeps happening again. I've quit and gone back so many times now it's almost amusing. Here are the ones I remember clearest.

Age 13: First cigarette. I coughed so much I almost hurled. T'was to be a sordid affair of hiding under the porch and extra long walks around the neighborhood. A pretty casual smoker, long hiatus due to lack of availability.
Age 15: Begin dating boyfriend over 18 who smokes, enough said.
Age 16-17: Start working at bagel store where smoking is the only thing that gets you a break, and the customers are enough to give anyone an addiction. Try to quit for a summer, little luck.
Age 18: Start college after a three week break and progressively make it up to a pack a day. Do the Nicorette thing for a few weeks, start smoking again at an art exhibit.
Age 19: Quit after summer of arduous labor at Publix. Do extremely well except for occasional parties, concerts and a few weeks of "break up" smoking.
Age 22: Now that I'm in Japan I've started again. I'd like to chalk it up to stress, but that's sort of a cop out.

I think I can give them up again. Maybe we just need a little more time together. What can I say, I love smoking and it loves me. I'm weak. And way to go me for making a blog all about me and my suffering. I am a true blogger now. Oh yeah, and on a side note some kid asked Lee if I was his Mom yesterday. Lee is over five years older than me. Perhaps it's the smoking is catching up to me with a quickness. At any rate, that kid better hope I never have him in class.